THE SIN OF HOMOSEXUALITY (In Honor Of My Uncle Joe Del Giudice)

I sat listening to a friend of mine speak about his conservatism. My mind was captivated, not by his words, but by the thought that this once beautiful, free spirited, person had fallen to the super conservative, Tea Party, mentality. Then he spit out the question. I knew the question, in his mind, would answer his questions about me. I knew that my answer would solidify my sanity (or lack of it.)

“Do you believe gays should be able to get married?”

The question was dropped. He was certain I would never believe in gay marriage. That’s too far left. That’s crazy. That’s against God and the sanctity of marriage. I was sure to be damned with my answer. I would forever be deemed a pagan and/or heathen.

“Seriously?” I laughed, because I knew that was going to be the question before he even parted his lips. “I think it is absolutely none of my business.”

Then I went on to explain exactly how I felt:

When President Obama supported Homosexual American’s I was overwhelmed. I felt proud to be an American. I cheered the celebratory, “Yes!” Our leader spoke out for freedom. It’s been a long time. I knew, in that second of time, God smiled down upon us.

The Gay Marriage issue doesn’t affect me. I’m not gay. I do believe in God, but my God is a loving God who teaches us not to pass judgment on others. I can’t pass judgment on anyone for who they choose to love. It isn’t my place.

As an American, I have to stand on the side of freedom. In America, we have the right to love freely. We have the right to share our hearts, souls, and love without degradation, humiliation, and/or shame. Isn’t that what free means?

I was ashamed of the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. How can American leaders, leaders of a supposedly free country, ask someone to pretend to be someone they aren’t? I dug into that policy to find that it wasn’t meant to protect the wellbeing of the homosexuals, it was meant to keep the “good soldiers” from doing “bad” things. I was in awe. In America, someone had to wear a mask to protect the biased and ignorant from losing control. The responsibility of homophobic acts of violence towards a homosexual is put on the homosexual. Nice. Let’s make the homosexual responsible for an inferior mind. If it wasn’t for the good soldiers hatred and violence toward gay people he would be a good person and a strong and respected American soldier. Wow. Let’s dress little old ladies up as Zena, children as Hercules, and Gays as Ministers. Will that façade keep violent people from attacking? The law was meant to protect the heterosexual soldiers from the gay soldiers. Of course, we all know the gay community is all about violence, right? So, if we mask gays in the military than the good hetero soldier won’t be provoked and won’t have to face charges for killing or abusing a good homo soldier. Amazing.

I bet somewhere there are many misguided, bible thumping, Conservatives that agree, based solely on their beliefs in God. After all, isn’t the bible the tool pushed by the Conservatives to speak out about the gay community? Isn’t that act, in itself, anti God and against that same bible they thump? Of course it is. I guess they forgot about the other sexual passages in the bible. You know, the one about our mouths being forbidden to touch genitals? Or how about that sodomy thing, are they so against that in their own sexual habits?

We all are Americans. We are all supposed to be free. Our nation doesn’t, and isn’t even supposed to, cater to the religious practices of some and condemn the rights of another. Americans are Americans first. Who they choose to be with is simply between them and their God. We don’t have the right to crucify anyone for their choices. We don’t have a right to try to alter who they are. They, too, are creatures created of the same God, if that is what one chooses to believe.

I feel sorry for the close minded that believe they have a right to make those judgment calls as if they were superior. They aren’t. I feel even worse for the ignorance that allows one to believe they are better than, stronger than, or more valid to God, based solely on their sexuality. I think I feel the worst for the people that buy into the political rhetoric, you know, where the politicians use God as if they are God’s Army, to push anti gay sentiment and people actually believe them? The truth is the politicians play on that as weakness. They manipulate the base with God and it works to draw votes (and to protect the insurance companies from having to pay anything they can avoid.) That is far more of a slam against my God than someone that simply loves.

If you’re worried about a place in Hell, will it be the gay person that loves and commits to another with all his heart and soul over those who pass judgment and think they have a right to limit a person using and manipulating God for their own agenda? I’m not God, but I think it’s pretty much a no brainer.

I do want to shout out to the President, “Job well done!” Thank you, President Obama, for the pride I felt.

All Americans are created equal. We all have the same rights. We should all be respected.

This one is for you, Uncle Joe, (and to many of my friends who have struggled with their sexuality) who had to live in the closet all of your life. How different would your life have been if it wasn't for your guilt as an Italian/Catholic homosexual. You were a brilliant man. You had a real and genuine soft heart. They chastised you, shocked your brain with "treatments," and shunned you. I am so sorry you had to live that way. I always knew you were gay, you know I knew, we talked openly about it. I loved you then, I love you now, and I will continue to fight for the rights you didn't have. You were more of a man than my own father. You knew how to love and you showed it to me and my children. We never passed judgment, you were Uncle Joe, and we all will never forget the role you had in our journey. The world owed you better and you could have flourished. I know your Hell on earth granted you immunity from the proposed "Hell fire." God knew your heart...as did I. I love you.

Till the next time…

Pam